I thought I had mastered the English language, until someone passed on that a friend of mine had recently passed out. I was so upset that I passed on an opportunity of a lifetime while I wept. This… Read More
Author: Mario Cloutier
Category: Earthly Contemplations
Tags: #earthlycontemplations, #english, #ESL, #funny, #joke, #phrasalverb, #silly, #welcometoearthdoctorS
Dictionaries sometimes make me feel dumb. I take the time to look up a word I don’t know, often to find that the definition contains one or more other words for which I don’t know the meaning. By… Read More
Author: Mario Cloutier
Category: Earthly Contemplations
Tags: #definition, #dictionary, #earthlycontemplations, #english, #funny, #joke, #pain, #rabbithole, #silly, #welcometoearthdoctorS
How does a language evolve to contain contranyms, i.e., words with opposite meanings (e.g., Bolt – to fasten or to flee quickly)? After all, throughout history there were professional lexicographers keeping track of words and their definitions. A… Read More
Author: Mario Cloutier
Category: Earthly Contemplations
Tags: #contranym, #definition, #earthlycontemplations, #english, #ESL, #funny, #joke, #joker, #jokester, #language, #practicaljoke, #silly, #welcometoearthdoctorS
If money is the root of all evil, then by deduction, mankind can achieve utopia by eliminating money. The problem is that money makes the world go around. So, achieving utopia means the Earth will stop spinning. Quite… Read More
Author: Mario Cloutier
Category: Earthly Contemplations
Tags: #earthlycontemplations, #english, #funny, #joke, #money, #proverb, #silly, #welcometoearthdoctorS
Using oxymorons in speech may seem weirdly normal to a small crowd of you, but they have me clearly confused. On one hand, I find them bittersweet and amazingly awful, while on the other I find them painfully… Read More
Author: Mario Cloutier
Category: Earthly Contemplations
Tags: #earthlycontemplations, #english, #funny, #joke, #oxymoron, #silly, #welcometoearthdoctorS
“Fore!” “Timber!” “Fire in the hole!” All terms intended to mean “Watch out!”. To the uninformed, confusion is more likely the result, possibly followed by injury. Why such terms are deemed necessary fascinates me. I therefore propose to… Read More
Author: Mario Cloutier
Category: Earthly Contemplations
Tags: #earthlycontemplations, #english, #fireinthehole, #Fore, #golf, #silly, #timber, #warning, #welcometoearthdoctorS
Strolling on the beach this morning, I found myself lost in thought. My intention was to take a long power walk. Rather than hoofing it, I found myself traipsing along, my gait and pace frequently changing. Tiptoeing, lurching,… Read More
Author: Mario Cloutier
Category: Earthly Contemplations
Tags: #beach, #earthlycontemplations, #english, #humor, #silly, #walk, #welcometoearthdoctorS
Mastering the English language requires a phenomenal memory, so as to properly use and understand idioms and acronyms. But in addition, one must remember how to properly use little words like in, out, off, up, or down. Improper… Read More
Author: Mario Cloutier
Category: Earthly Contemplations
Tags: #earthlycontemplations, #english, #funny, #humor, #idioms, #phrasalverbs, #silly, #welcometoearthdoctorS
Once upon a fortnight, the English language throws me for a loop. Take the term “bi-weekly”, for example. It can mean twice per week or once every two weeks. While I appreciate the fact that some words have… Read More
Author: Mario Cloutier
Category: Earthly Contemplations
Tags: #biweekly, #calendar, #earthlycontemplations, #english, #fortnite, #humor, #silly
